Figuring out who the fuck I am.

As I lay here, half drunk, jamming Kendrick Lamar, the question I keep asking myself is if who am I?

Who the fuck am I? A young woman who’s gone through tragedy (but I shouldn’t make my tragedy a factor, I shouldn’t play victim) from mamelodi.

That cannot be my truth cause that’s going to piss me off. Let’s try again.

A young black woman who believes in herself... ok that’s not true. Let’s try again.

I am a young black woman who grew up in the hood. A woman who knows how to hustle.. ok that’s a lie too.

Do I not know who I am? Also why do I try find my identity in all my tragedy? Let’s try again...

I am a young African woman who knows loyalty. Ambitious but lazy. A woman who is capable of taking over the world but hasn’t because of her fears and insecurities... ok that’s not impressive.

It’s a journey right? I’m only 23. I should figure it out soon right?

Who the fuck am I?!